How much social in Social Networking?

Social networking and media can fool you. Oh yeah, you’ve got a hundred contacts here, a 1000 there, and more folks are friending you on Facebook every day.

But what’s really happening? Is the world knocking your door down? Are these folks really your friends? The hard truth is that most of these folks will engage you in no more than water cooler chat.

Reality can be rough, but this isn’t out of your control. There’s hope and better relationships ahead. We just have to step off the path a bit.

What can you do? How can you turn contacts into partners, associates, and friends? Investment!

The biggest mistake we make is looking for more when we’re not willing to take the first step. As in relationships of any kind, it takes time and effort to form a bond. This is amplified in some ways by the sheer distances across which we reach with the internet.

Investment isn’t about spending more money, or taking out stock in a the latest Facebook copy cat. It’s about investing in those threadbare connections. Turn the water cooler chat into sharing about plans, dreams, and that secret tattoo.

As a person struggling with this every day, and feeling the pressure myself, I’ve set myself on a path to move through this struggle. There are a few things I’ve done to move things forward.

- send postcards - folks really enjoy these, and they give you a chance to send a hand written and personal note to someone, an individual, across miles, and even across oceans. This is the personal touch that gets remembered and says, “I like you.”

- ask how you can support them - I find myself more and more asking how I can support people. Yes, I fail sometimes, but I’m getting better. But it’s about the effort. Get in there and actually support folks. Don’t just cheer on the sidelines! Visit their blog, link to them, send your friends to their site, pimp out their book, or even consider praying for them.

- pick up the phone - if you can’t be there, the next best thing is a human voice. I’ve witnessed first hand how life changing a single phone call can be. It doesn’t have to be a heavy thing, but reach out, touch someone’s life today. You can’t do business either until you connect.

- when all else fails, visit in person - I’d taken the opportunity this year to do just that. I’ve to meetups, lunches, breakfasts, and dinners, blogger meetings, tweetups, and taken photo walks. Heck, we even stayed at a Flickr friend’s house for a week. Wow!

I’m no genius and these aren’t brain surgery level tips. These are simple and practical things you can start doing today.

To show you I’m serious, email me, DM me, send me a private Utterz, call. Tell me about yourself, how we can connect, and where you’re looking for support. Beyond that, I challenge you to reach out today to one of those people you’ve got in your contact list and let them know you’re more than an avatar.

PS - get an avatar with a smile why don’t you.